August 16, 2005

• I haven’t blogged in awhile…….I’ve been a “lurker” <smile>. Lately I have been a little dry, a little sad, a little disconnected in many ways. But tonight God spoke to me in ways only He can do. This blog may be long and boring, I don’t expect many to make it to the end. But this evening has been a journey for me that has reaffirmed God’s love in my life, it’s given me strength and caused me to truly reflect the blessings we have in Christ and the love that we share. My friend Larry is 96, soon to be 97 (Oct 23) and he has been in the hospital now going on three weeks. We hope he will be out soon and back home. The hospital staff is great, but there is nothing like the love one gets at home. Larry lives in a retirement home in Altamonte Springs, one of two I play and sing at. Anyway, I went to the Maitland retirement home tonight to sing and I was, well, I was parched spiritually as I entered. I had a thirst for God’s presence but have been moving so fast that I was missing the call to slow down and just commune with Him.

  
  

  As is my custom, I walked around and talked to all the residents before I sat down to play. I held their hands, entered their lives and felt their smiles enter my heart. I sat down and picked up my guitar and sensed that some songs of hope were needed, not only for them but for me. I started with a song my wife wrote during church one day day in September as the preacher (Steve) was delivering his message called “My Surrender Is Yours”. When I was done and I opened my eyes, I saw hearts that were so very much like mine all throughout the room. I next played a song called “I will Overcome” by Charlie Hall and dedicated it to my friend Richard in Drug Rehab, I think we all needed this song tonight……”O Lord I’m Strong in You, O Lord I’m wise in You, O Lord I can see in You…..So I will overcome”. We talked a little about struggle……at the age of 80 and 90, struggle becomes something that is very prevalent in your life sometimes. Next I played a song for my dear friend, Lena, “I Saw The Light”. She is a tiny woman with a huge warm smile. While she can’t walk she can tap her feet in a dance that can only be with the Lord. “Just like the Blind man I wandered alone, worries and fears I claimed for my own. Then like a blind man that God gave back his sight….Praise the Lord, I saw the light!” About this time we were rockin! I brought it back down with a song that is on our new CD. Christi, if you read this, this is for you: “Song of Love” by Rebecca St. James. Every time I hear Christi sing this song I have to close my eyes in prayer because the words speak so much to my heart….I think they spoke to many hearts tonight…..”The Heaven’s declare You are God and the Mountains rejoice! The Oceans cry Alleluia as we worship You Lord………….for this is our song of love.” And it was our song of love tonight! I felt God’s presence in the room and could see His love in the eyes of all these people that long for His comfort in their lives. We smiled and talked some about the awesomeness of the God we serve and who loves us so much, which naturally lead into an old standard that everyone loved…..”The Old Rugged Cross”.  As I sang these words I could hear a chorus of voices lifting up to the heaven’s in this tiny room, “So I’ll cherish the Old Rugged Cross, till my trophies at last I lay down…..I will cling to the Old Rugged Cross, and exchange it some day for a crown”. This led to a song by Marie Barnett that I simply love……because as I contemplate the Cross and the sacrifice that was made for us, the agony, yet the glory………Jesus becomes the air we breathe. I sang “Breathe” and could feel not only in my heart by the hearts of many of my friends the humble but joyful desperation of that need to be near God. The words that speak most to me here are, “Your Holy presence living in me……….I’m desperate for You……I’m so lost without You…..” As  I opened my eyes after this song I could feel the longing in many of the hearts near me for Christ. I decided to continue on with an appropriate song of hope written by Nigle Briggs, “I will Hold On”. No matter what age we are, I find that one of the most comforting things in my life is letting go, just trusting in Christ’ leading…….”My times are in your hands, I know I’ll never understand…..but I’ll trust in You. Sometimes my heart grows cold, I’m sorry when I take control….but I’ll trust in You……..even when I fall….You help me stand…..even when I’m lost….You take my hand…….I will old on….I will hold on….I will hold on….yes, I will trust in You….” Oh how these words speak to my heart! Next I picked it up with a song by Paul Oakly, “Here I Am”. I play it in a country flatpickin’ style and we were rockin! I heard hands clappin and hearts singing, especially on the chorus: “And I will always love Your name…..and I will always sing Your praise!” We talked about thanking God in our lives and shared with each other smiles and hearts on fire! I continued on with “Amazing Love” and “Apart From You” and probably a few others……. and the evening was over. We prayed, God smiled, we all laughed and I held each hand before I left. I left with  a full heart, with a qunched spirit and a smile.

  
  

  Next I stopped up at the hospital to see my friend, Larry. When I arrived he was uncovered (and I’ts cold in the hospital!) and lying in bed. I sat on the edge of the bed, held his hand tightly and we talked, well, mostly I listened <smile>. As I held Larry’s hand I could not not help but feel humbled to hold the hand of a man that at almost 97, has given so very much of his life to loving others and sharing the gifts that God gave him to bring smiles to hearts and Christ in lives that were in need of a loving touch. At 94, Larry still drove his car…..he not only played organ at his church on Sunday and Sunday evening, but he played at a retirement home, Village on the Green each week, for his lodge each monh and he led a kitchen band every week at another home. Larry has no family…….but God has blessed him with a network of friends that looks out for his needs and who themselves are blessed by his presence and his love for others. Many times I would sit with him at his home and we would chuckle about his accidently showing up at church on a Wed morning thinking it was Sunday….or we would sort through his mail. At 94, he would insist on helping me when I came over to mow his grass or weed the back yard. He would shuffle while dragging the trash can behind him of grass clippings…and we would laugh….those were days that I often miss <smile>. We had allot of fun together. Sometime I will tell you about the frog that got into his house………well, suffice to say that I don’t like picking up frogs and had to get my wife Kelly to come over to rid his bathroom of his new friend! Anyway, tonight I sat and spent time with my friend, we talked, we chuckled and we prayed. He is so weak and frail right now, but I can see his heart shining through his eyes. While I am sad for him, I realize that he is truly blessed with many people in his life that love him….and we are all blessed by knowing him. It’s funny, many of us only barely know each other…but it’s like we’re on a team that God put together….we serve an awesome God! So here I am…….started out dry, and thirsty…………but now…..now I am back to that song by Rebecca St. James……..”Song of Love”: “Jesus….I am in awe of the love that….You have shown. Jesus….how precious You are to me…..to me…..”. I am just thankful…for so very much.

  
  

   

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